Every party in parliament agrees Australia is richer, cooler, prettier, better dressed, and will probably steal your man.
Echo Chamber is The Spinoff’s dispatch from the press gallery, recapping sessions in the House. Columns are written by politics reporter Lyric Waiwiri-Smith and Wellington editor Joel MacManus.
Did you know that the different parties in parliament have fundamental disagreements about economic policy?
The New Zealand Labour Party thinks everything in this country is fucked because of the current government. The New Zealand National Party thinks everything in this country is fucked because of the previous government (the one run by the New Zealand Labour Party).
New Zealand First, meanwhile, thinks everything in this country is fucked because of the word “Aotearoa”. The Green Party of Aotearoa New Zealand think this country is fucked because of a long-standing guillotine shortage. Te Pāti Māori think the country is fucked because of an Atlas Network conspiracy to destroy indigenous rights. And the Act Party thinks the country is fucked because sometimes university professors say mean things about David Seymour.
Of course, none of them are right. The country is fucked because RJ’s stopped making Jaffas.
After an extended winter break, the members of New Zealand’s parliament have returned to Wellington to resume arguing with one another. One might have hoped that over the break, they might have figured out some new angles, but alas. It’s all the same shit.
During Wednesday’s question time, Labour’s Chris Hipkins and Barbara Edmonds were very keen to hammer the government over a new builder sentiment report, which showed the construction sector cratering with 15,000 job losses and masses of workers moving to Australia. They blamed the current government for cancelling a whole bunch of projects to build state homes, school upgrades, hospitals and public transport.
National’s Christopher Luxon and Nicola Willis responded with a formal “nuh-uh it’s your fault” and blamed the previous government for spending too much money on nonsense like state homes, school upgrades, hospitals and nonexistent light rail; thereby contributing to inflation, forcing the Reserve Bank to raise interest rates and creating a recession.
Both major parties are essentially stuck in an ever-revolving hamster wheel of argument, where neither side is entirely wrong and neither side is entirely right. National swept to power on a wave of voter dissatisfaction with inflation and stagnating growth. Many people fairly blamed the Labour government’s policies for contributing to that inflation. But while inflation has come down, economic conditions under the current government haven’t turned around as quickly as many would have hoped. Nearly two years into the government, Labour hopes voters are forgetting about the last government, and National is determined to remind them. Finger-pointing is reaching record levels.
Following on from the previous day’s theme, Green leader Chlöe Swarbrick took aim at the government for the number of New Zealanders leaving the country – 191 people per day, according to analysis from Bernard Hickey. She quoted one young worker who described New Zealand with the phrase “No work. Shit pay. Why stay?” That earned her a telling-off from speaker Gerry Brownlee, who is clearly feeling a bit sensitive about swears after Brooke van Velden dropped the c-bomb back in May.
Using emigration rates as evidence of a government’s failings is an old tactic. John Key used it with particular effectiveness as opposition leader, famously using Wellington Stadium in his 2008 election campaign to emphasise the number of people leaving for Australia annually. There was no attempt to defend this point from the government benches. Their response was, basically, “yeah, obviously people are leaving, it sucks here, but it’s the last government’s fault”.
“Australia, for example, is a wealthier country than New Zealand and can pay higher wages,” said Nicola Willis. Everyone in parliament agrees Australia is richer, cooler, prettier, better dressed, and will probably steal your man. They’re just arguing about who to blame.
Luxon said the emigration numbers proved the Green Party should support fossil fuel industries. “Where do Kiwis go when they go to Australia? They go to work in oil and gas and mining,” he said. (Are there a lot of mines on the Gold Coast?)
Winston Peters, too, kept with the theme of repeating the same old hits. When Green MP Benjamin Doyle asked questions to health minister Casey Castello about the government falling behind on its goal of eliminating locally transmitted HIV in Aotearoa, Peter was very angry about that last word. “Point of order, Mr Speaker. How did this question get approved by you or your staff when in the last few words, he mentioned a country that is not known in this world, nor was it recognised by the United Nations?” he said. Brownlee made Doyle repeat the question – they simply changed it to “Aotearoa New Zealand”. This is an ongoing game between the Greens and New Zealand First, which has no foreseeable end. The more Peters complains about the word “Aotearoa”, the more the Greens will keep saying it. Around and around we go, spiralling continually inwards, getting nowhere.
One for the record
Parliament often welcomes delegations of visiting international politicians to sit in the public gallery and observe question time. The speaker traditionally kicks things off by welcoming the manuhiri, and the MPs stand to applaud them in acknowledgement. On Wednesday, a small group from France was in attendance.
During his questions, Te Pāti Māori co-leader Rawiri Waititi focused on concerns raised by the UN special rapporteur on the rights of indigenous peoples, Albert K Barume, about the Regulatory Standards Bill. But it became clear that Waititi didn’t know how to pronounce “rapporteur”.
David Seymour interjected: “Point of order. Mr Speaker, normally I’d let it go, but seeing as we have guests from the French senate, can we please have it said ‘rapporteur’, not ‘repertoire’?”
