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RecapsDecember 18, 2014

The Tribe Has Spoken: Survivor San Juan Del Sur Episodes 11 & 12

jaclyn derp

Survivor San Juan Del Sur: Blood Vs Water 2 Power Rankings

Got a double dose for you today because they weirdly screened a double episode in America and now FOUR is a few weeks behind the eight ball (which is bloody annoying by the way!).

This season is continuing to do a great job of digging itself out of the mire it built up in the pre-merge stage. The cast have really come out of their shells and we’re left with a handful of truly dynamic characters. More that that, it’s great that the future is still extremely murky. The editors have diddled with us again and again so, at this point, it’s hard to put much stock in anything like ‘the winners edit’ or game theory extrapolation. I’m obviously pulling for lovely Natalie, but honestly wouldn’t be surprised with any of these castaways taking the win.

Anyway here’s the highlights:

19) Reed’s Nice Handwriting

nice writing

Ooooh very fancy.

18) Psycho Challenge

It’s a shame this challenge got called via the tight five being too tight, because it looked really hard out. I mean, it was skulls getting smashed by massive rocks!

Literally.

Fig1:

psycho challenge1

Fig2:

psycho challenge2

17) Dirty Old Jon

dirty jon

Why is Jon so dirty? Wtf?

16) Idol Hiders Phoning It In Again

I don’t like when former Survivor players are like, “back in my day Survivor was bloody hard as shit and we had to do a bloody math equation and chop off our own blimmin’ fingers to get an idol, but these days they just give em to ya! It’s bullshit.”

Normally I hate that, but honestly it’s getting about ridiculous. Like, look at this:

obvious idol

Wow. I honestly can’t imagine an idol hiding place more obvious than this.

15) The Fight

the fight

Jon and Jaclyn’s fight was pretty weird eh! Cool I guess.

14) The Brat

baylor being bratty

Baylor was definitely being a wee brat tbh and it’s annoying how her mum is always fighting her bloody battles for her. Best bits of this little fight thing were Reed going full on bitch:

furious reed

AND MISSY PULLING AN ANDREW MEHRTENS AND FLIPPING THE BIRD!

missy finger

13) Miserable Jeff

Funny how Jeff clearly hates this season and is in hell 24/7. Love it.

jeff calling the challenge

12) Jury Wes

jury wes

LMFAO jury Wes look like first generation Justin Bieber!

11) Jaclyn

jaclyn derp

I know Jon is getting all the blimmin’ screen time, but it seems to me that Jaclyn is way better at Survivor. She has way better Survivor instincts and way better power-flirt moves. She’s like a proto-Parvati.

10) Outrageous Behaviour

Alec flirting with Jaclyn was honestly outrageous. Look at this bloody clear as day footsie!

footsie1

Fine. Harmless. All g. And then…

footsie2

Oh shit!

And when Jeff questioned her at tribal Jaclyn turned 100% into a tomato.

jaclyn blush

9) RIP Reed

goodbye reed

It’s been real mate.

8) Natalie’s Vendetta

furious nat

I LOVE THE NATALIE REVENGE PLOT. It’s great. She’s basically a slinky moustache short of Inigo Montoya!

7) Another Stellar Look from Keith

keith bandana

Grove Street 4 Lyf

6) Weird Challenge

weird little challenge

Why are these fairly standard endurance challenges getting so complicated? Honestly not worth it.

5) Alec Gets Real

alec gets real

Alec trying to flirt his way through three more days was bloody classic. I loved it. “This game has changed me : ( “

What a legend.

4) Jon the Wine Baby

 

ah the wine

Ah the lovely vintage.

This is the face Jon made while putting on a little baby voice and saying, “I’m almost finished my wine.”

wine baby

Jesus.

3) Rat

There was a rat at tribal council. Cool eh!

rat

2) Natalie’s Move

Hard to tell if Nat’s move was good or not. Definitely made for some good facials though.

jon shock

missy shock

jac shock

keith wink

1) “KIETH”

kieth

Lmao Alec goes down in the most Alec way imaginable. What a nitwit!

TWO MORE EPISODES TO GO!

Watch Survivor Blood vs Water: San Juan Del Sur on FOUR Now here

Keep going!